Moving and Gymnastics

The dirty door before....

I haven't been writing for a while; I'd be surprised if anyone is still even reading this. Anyone out there?? Hellooooo????


We've had a lot going on lately, but all good and exciting things. The first big news most people know about is that we are moving--where, I have no idea. When, who knows! But our goal is by spring, summer at latest. We had a realtor come out to look at the house, and even though he was polite, he let us know that the house really needs a lot of fixing up. I've always known this, but looking at it through someone else's eyes was a reality check. So we put together a plan that we'll get this house all spruced up with fresh paint and new carpet and hopefully get the house on the market by winter or spring. Most likely spring, which is fine, because when we move, we want to bring the swing set with us. The kids love it, and we spent a lot of money paying for it! Not to mention Dennis put a lot of work into it when he made it.

We decided we won't start any major fix-ups until after Thanksgiving, but I have been slowly been making my way around the house, re-painting doors and trim and getting rid of scuff marks, dirt and crayon/marker drawings.

The newly painted door "after"!


Other things that have been going on is that Luke has started gymnastics. He Loves It. He loves it!! You have no idea how great it feels as a parent to finally find something that your kid loves--a kid that is very hard to please because he has low self-esteem and doesn't want to try new things because he doesn't want to fail at it. Yes, I know that sounds like a pity party I'm throwing for Luke, but it's just the truth. His self-esteem is really low. But, he loves gymnastics, and bonus--he's pretty good at it!! True, he can't do a cartwheel yet (though he is convinced that yesterday he actually did one but what he actually did was a handstand and belly flop), but he is really good at anything with upper-body strength which is basically 95% of what gymnastics is. He mastered the mount to get on the "horse" yesterday, and now they are teaching him to start to swing his legs back and forth. It's so exciting to see him master these little steps that will eventually lead him to this:

Ok, maybe I'm jumping the gun a little here. But there are high school kids actually doing this! It is just so neat to watch.

The one thing that makes me sad is watching Lucy through all this. She had been the one to start gymnastics, and she loved it. She never passed the Beginners class because she didn't master the last two skills (they have to master 5 skills before passing to the next level) and we told her that she couldn't do gymnastics anymore because it was Luke's turn and we couldn't afford to have them both do it. We did tell her that she could go back in the winter session though. Until we found out how good this is for Luke, that is. Gymnastics has been great for his self-esteem, great for coordination, following directions and more important, his sensory issues. Gymnastics has really been good for him and he needs it more than Lucy does.

Not only does Lucy not get to do gymnastics now, she also has to go to Luke's class to watch it. Oh, it's like a little knife in the heart to watch her watch Luke through the window! She is forced to watch him because her catechism class is on the same day that Luke's gymnastics class is, plus, it's just down the road from the church. So while Luke is doing gymnastics, I leave to get pick up Lucy and we stay the last 20 minutes to watch Luke.  It doesn't make sense to bring her home first as it would be a waste of gas and I would be late picking up Luke. So, yes, she is forced to watch Luke. It is so sad for both of us, and I guess I'm feeling it all with a mother's heart.

Before we realized that financially, we wouldn't be able to afford both Lucy and Luke's gymnastics, I had been telling Lucy to keep practicing her cartwheels and handstands so she wouldn't forget how to do them and be able to pass her Beginners class. So while Luke is doing his gymnastics, there is Lucy off in the corner doing handstands and cartwheels.

I had to tell her last night we couldn't give this to her as a Christmas present like we had thought and her eyes filled up with tears.

Ok, I'm going to rant a little here.

I know that kids have to learn disappointment, and I know that there are "real" problems in the world going on right now; that there are kids who are starving, kids who have suffered in the typhoon that hit. I know that. And yes, in the grand scheme of things, my kids are pretty darn lucky. No, blessed. We have a lot and the things we don't have, we can do without.

But in this little town of Chaska where nothing much happens, where we deal with the every day ups and downs, it's hard to keep overlooking Lucy, who is sandwiched between two special-ed brothers with sensory issues. Who, in Lucy's eyes, gets to get out of school early so that they can "play" and do fun things in therapy, who need special help with homework, who get special one-on-one time at bedtime with stories in order to help the boys very low confidence level, who have special help from para's in school whenever they need it, who didn't get a FISH award yet the boys did for accomplishing something very little, and who is always depended heavily upon because she is the mature one, she is the calm one, the peace-maker, the dependable one. She is the one we tend to use a lot to "get the job done" or to defend her brothers at school, or to walk away from kids who won't let her brothers play with them. We ask so much from her. We can expect her to deliver and maybe that's not fair of us.

And so it was with a lump in my throat that I had to ask Lucy to give yet another sacrifice; to give up gymnastics so that her brother could go--because he needs it. It is always the excuse and reason we give her: "They need it more than you do." And while it's true, it seems so unfair.

She didn't kick or scream, she just looked so sad and said okay. She is the peace-maker.

Okay, so I've gotten carried away with my rant and now I'm sitting here bawling as I type all this. The good news is that I talked to Grandma about this: I needed a woman to talk to--not that Dennis doesn't totally understand, but he sees only the financial end of things. And he's right-we can't afford this for the both of them. But Grandma likes to give events and outings for Christmas presents rather than toys anyway, so I asked if she would be willing to help me pay for Lucy to get one session for her--whatever she is willing to give--just so that Lucy can pass that one class. Lucy is an over-achiever and it really bothered her that she didn't pass.

She seemed to really feel for Lucy and said she would be happy to help. Thank goodness for Grandma. Lucy won't be able to go all year long, but at least for this one session. And maybe, in the summer we'll have Luke take a break and give Lucy a chance to go.

Lucy is going to be so happy. I can't wait until Christmas.

Fish Awards

Yay! Today was Max and Luke Fish Award Ceremony; a ceremony held a few times a year to recognize students personal achievements during the school year. It is also their "Pep Fest"--you remember those, don't you?

The families of the students receiving awards were invited to attend, and unlike so many schools, this school does not give an award to everyone! That's right, you gotta earn it baby!

I do feel kind of sorry for the other students who work hard to be recognized and don't receive an award. Lucy is one of those students, an over-achiever, really. She works really hard in school, is basically a good kid and tries hard to be friendly to others. We told her that we see her efforts though, even if she isn't officially recognized for it by the school. It sounded better in my head than how it came out.

Anyway, Max's award was for personal achievement: last year he was very quiet, did not speak to anyone, volunteer for anything, was not a "book buddy" (the older kids team up with the Kindergarteners and read them books). But this year, he volunteered in front of his class to demonstrate how to use the calender and he was a book buddy to a little boy and read him a book! His teachers were so proud of him they wanted to give him a Fish Award to encourage him to keep it up.

We were very proud of him and cheered from we sat.

Luke received an award too, though his picture didn't turn out at all. I'm not even going to bother posting it, that's how bad it is.

His Fish Award was for standing up for himself for the first time. He finally had "enough" of being pushed around by the girls and told a little girl (who had told him that she didnt' like him): "That's mean, and it hurts my feelings when you say that." She looked surprised and said, "Oh, I'm sorry! I didn't know--I won't do it again."

The teacher overheard and was so proud of how he handled the situation, plus he taught this little girl something about others feelings that her teachers had been trying to teach her for a long time! Believe me, knowing Luke, this took him a lot of self-control to talk to her like that!

Since I don't have a picture for Luke, here is a video of him receiving his award. (You will have to go to the actual blog to see it.)



And here is Max receiving his award:

Great Accomplishments for a 6 year old!

I have a happier post on Luke today, and I've been meaning to update for a while, but you know how it is!

After venting my feelings in my post about Luke, I contacted his teacher and special ed teacher. (Actually I think I contacted her before.) Both were very willing to help and sympathetic. His special ed teacher told me that they're working with Luke on social skills and his teacher said she would ask Luke if there was anyone he wanted to sit next to in class the next day. So after he arrived at school, the teacher asked him who he would like to sit next to and Luke replied with his usual, "I don't know" (a frustrating answer for those who are trying to help him!) and he finally chose a boy named Alex, who didn't really know at the time.

After writing my last blog post I went to Adoration and prayed that Luke would find a friend, as I know all of you have done. I offered a rosary that he would have a friend that day and when the kids got home I asked them all as I always do how their day went. Everyone said, "Ok" but Luke said, "It went GREAT!!!" I have never had a response like this from Luke before! I asked why it was such a great day and he said that a little boy named Alex went up to him at recess and asked if they could be friends and offered to teach Luke some sport skills so that he could join in more. Where did this kid from and where has he been hiding?!? He has been an angel in disguise for Luke. I was and am so grateful for this little boy. Ashley (the special ed teacher) said that Alex is a good little boy who has been a great example for many kids--sticks up for the kids who aren't liked.

Later in the week, the class read a book about best friends and the teacher had them do a little exercise on who their best friends were. Luke talked about James, a little boy from his preschool who he has not seen in about a year but I know he misses him very much. This is what he wrote (with help from his para):

I found this while looking through Luke's backpack or I never would have known that he was missing James so much. I took pictures along with an email to James mom asking if we could arrange for a playdate. She was so moved by this that she asked if they could have Luke over for dinner this week!

 One of the best things is that the day the class did the "best friends exercise", Luke told me that Alex put Luke down as his best friend! Wow! And it doesn't stop there!

The other great thing that happened is that Luke is up for a "FISH Award"! A Fish Award are for students who are recognized for going "above and beyond" in some way--it could be in school work, helping others or accomplishing a goal. Luke's award is for standing up for himself for the first time the other day: a little girl who DAILY tells Luke that she doesn't like him again told him, "I don't like you." Usually Luke just slunks away when she says this, but that day he said to her: "That's mean. It hurts my feelings when you say that." A the little girl (who I found out has some problems of her own and doesn't mean to intentionally hurt others), looked surprised and said, "Oh, I'm sorry! I won't do that anymore." His teacher overheard this and praised Luke for standing up for himself and teaching the little girl about how words can hurt others, and so he's up for a Fish Award! (Max is also up for a Fish Award for something different that I'll have to talk about in a seperate post.)

So hopefully things are now only get better; it's definitely been an answer to prayer!

Mr.Luke

I need prayers for "Mr. Luke", as I call him. He's hurting deep inside at school. He told me the other day that he has no friends, that no one likes him at school, that no one talks to him in class. When he told me this, he got a little choked up though he was trying hard not to cry, and my heart broke right in half.

This is the same problem as last year; no one liked him, he had no friends. If kids talked to him at all, it would be to insult him. One little girl would tell him every day that she didn't like him. He tried to ignore it and to his credit, wouldn't say anything back to her, but it got to him after a while. Pretty soon he was faking illnesses so he wouldn't have to go to school. He was thrilled when he got sick for real and got pneumonia.

I was hoping it would be different this year, but a lot of the kids in his class are from his Kindergarten class, so they already have an opinion about him. I had to drop him off late one day because of his therapy, and as I was leaving, I saw him outside at recess. He was by himself playing, while everyone just played around him. I waited and watched for a few minutes to see if he would approach some kids but he never did. I asked him later why he doesn't try to play with the other kids and he said because they say "no" when he tries.

Over the summer, he got an official diagnosis of ADHD and PPD (a diagnosis meaning that there are many symptoms of autism but not enough to call it autism). In the report, it was said that Luke didn't appear to be "able" to carry on a conversation--meaning that he was unable to meet eye contact, and that he would act inappropriate, say inappropriate things, get into someone's personal space, get too touchy-feely or be too silly. This is how it is for him with basically everyone, and many of these behaviors are "cover-ups" because he doesn't know what to do. A lot of this will get better as he matures but he also will be getting social skills in school to help him know how to cope so he can make friends.

So I ask as Luke's family, to please say a prayer for him that he will make at least one friend at school. It's very hard for me to send him to school knowing that he will be lonely and insulted.

To end on a bright note, I had the inspiration to put Luke into boys gymnastics. He needs something to boost his self-esteem up and I think (because he's pretty strong for his age) that he could be good at it. At first he was skeptical and said seriously (when I brought it up to him), "I think it's too dangerous. But thanks anyway, Mom."  But then I showed him the videos I took of Lucy at her first class and how they teach one-on-one, and start everything very small and low to the ground and he began to warm up to the idea. (It also helped to see all the trampolines and the foam pit!)

It's too late to sign him up now (and besides, we're broke) but I'm going to save up and get him enrolled in the winter. I really hope that 6 months from now I will be able to tell a different story about Luke and how he's doing!

Thanks in advance for the prayers. ;-)

It's been a long time....

It's been a long time since I've updated, and although there has been much to tell, there hasn't been much time to talk. Or blog.

Over the summer, we've gone camping...highlights of one of the camping trips is that one of my children-on-the-dock-fears came true--Luke fell off the dock and into the water. Luckily, it was in the shallow end, but still. He was pretty upset about it. Yes, I took a picture anyway.

This was taken just before Luke fell in.

Dripping wet, but lesson learned.

That was in June. In July, we celebrated Luke's 6th birthday.

We also celebrated America's birthday....

Lucy and Anna got their crazy 4th of July hair done again.

It was also the first year we let the kids do sparklers. Rather scary!

We went to visit Minnesota's largest candy store...it had a lot, but I wouldn't say it was a huge place.

And that was it! We had one more camping trip, and some visi

The end of the Swing Set

I just bought a new swing set last year called the "Flexible Flyer". When Dennis expressed his doubts that it would hold up for 5 kids, I pointed to the picture on the box and and showed him the picture of five happy children swinging on the swing set. I also pointed out that it was called "The Flexible Flyer". So that would mean that the bars would flexible, right?

One would think so, but the swing set has gone through a lot of use over the months. It has broken a few times already; the seat on the glider broke off the day after we bought it (that made me mad!) and then a few months later the entire glider fell off the swing set. Not long after that, one of the legs broke off of the slide, making it unusable. One would think that that would mean we would get rid of the swing set, wouldn't one? Nope. 'Cause if you get a new swing set, one needs money to buy one.

I took this picture the day before the swing set broke for good. It was raining that day.

Then the other day, after swinging on the swing set, the kids came in to tell me that the swing set was acting funny. They told me it kept "jumping up" whenever they would swing. Thinking they meant that the legs were coming out of the cement, I wasn't too worried, because out of all our swing set problems, that has been one we could live with as long as the kids didn't swing too high. I just told the kids to stay off of it until Daddy had a chance to cement it down again.

Later, I looked out the window and saw that the bar on top (the one that holds the swings up) was popping up on one of the ends. Again, I wasn't too worried because it looked like an easy fix but told the kids again to stay off of it for now.

Then we did errands and pretty much forgot about the swing set. Later, as I was checking email on the computer, I suddenly remember the swing set as I was listening to the kids play outside and heard a big crash and then screams and crying. Immediately I remembered and knew what happened, and without even stopping to look out the bedroom window (it faces the backyard), I ran through the house to the sun room where Max and Luke came in the house screaming and looking terrified.

The entire swing set collapsed on top of them.

Ok, not the entire swing set, but the upper bar, which is pretty much the backbone of the whole thing. And the bar fell right on top of Max's head.

 

Imagine an iron bar that weighs about 20-30 pounds crashing down on your head.

Thankfully, it was only Luke and Max swinging at the time, and while of course I wish they didn't get hurt, I'm just glad it wasn't all four of them swinging, like it normally is or things probably would have been a lot worse.

As it was, the bar nicked Luke in the head but mostly, he got tangled up in the swings. He scraped his elbow but was mostly just shook up.

Max got it directly on the head; featuring two large goose eggs. One on the forehead and one on the head where you couldn't see it because of his hair, but you could feel it. They were both shook up bad but I was worried more for Max; I couldn't get him to calm down with his crying, and then he went into a zone where he wasn't talking right or seem to understand me. I told him to go on the computer, to distract him. It took some talking to get him to do it--believe me, that's saying something because Max loves any excuse to get on the computer!

I felt horrible about the whole thing. The problem with your kids getting hurt is you always find an area where you are to blame. I should have gone outside to check the swing set. I should have remembered to make the kids stay off of it. I should have, I should have.

Now you are probably thinking, "you should have brought Max in for a CAT Scan." Well, that is one area I think I did the right thing. I did think about bringing him in just to make sure all was well, but he was so shook up and so much in a shock that I didn't want to further traumatize him with bringing him to the hospital for tests, just for things to probably turn out okay. I decided to "wait and watch", asking him every so often how he was feeling, watching for sleepiness or any sort of vision change. After a computer turn, he seemed to be back to his old self, complaining only of a head ache. 

The excitement here just never ends. 

It took some coaxing, but I begged talked Dennis into making us a swing set out of wood. I knew that the swing set was unfixable and even if it was fixable, I didn't trust it anymore. The "Flexible Flyer" was not so flexible after all. 

I had to have the kids help in coaxing Dennis to make a swing set, but I was desperate. I'm not kidding, we rely on that swing set a lot. It helps with sensory issues as well entertainment on windy, rainy, hot and humid and even snowy days. That swing set is used A LOT. And Max, who uses the swing set more than anyone (which is probably what was the beginning of the end for the swing set), swings on the swing set as early as 7:30 in the morning to as late as 8:00 at night. Not all at once, of course, but the point is, it's used a lot!

In the end, it was Lucy's crocodile tears and the trauma of the whole thing that made Dennis relent. I think he would have done it even without the tears. 

Home Depot sells "make it yourself" wooden swing sets which helped a lot. For now, we have one set of the swing sets done, which have only two swings to it, but at least it will be safe. We're going to buy a second set so that more kids can use it at the same time, but not all on the same bar.

Hopefully next post will be of the kids swinging on their new swing set, and this time, with nothing crashing down on them.

Mirror, Mirror, on the wall....Oh wait.

The second day of summer vacation started with a bang. I mean, literally.

It was a tough morning. I remember it was one of those mornings when Henry woke up waaaay too early  (he's been doing that lately), and when I was getting breakfast ready, Anna was having a tantrum about something. She has been having a lot of tantrums lately; we think it's due to part of her speech and not being understood right away and also just being the middle child and sometimes being overlooked. (In her opinion, that is.)

Other things were going on, although I can't remember what exactly. I do remember it was just a crazy morning and I hadn't even had my morning coffee yet. And then all of a sudden there was this humungous crash from downstairs, that sounded like a million plates crashing. Then I heard Max screaming for me to come quick. I was thinking that he was climbing on the shelves downstairs in the closet (they do that often to get something down) and he fell into the mirror closet doors. Then of course, I was imaging him sitting in a heap of broken glass and covered with blood so I ran downstairs yelling, "Don't move! Don't move!"

Luckily, it was nothing like that. What actually happened was this:

Notice something missing? There was a large mirror hanging over the toilet, and that was what came crashing down. That vertical board hanging there is supposed to be horizontal, but as you can see, the boards came loose and the entire mirror came crashing down.

There was glass everywhere!

 

The mirror even knocked down the cart that sitting next to the toilet. Yes, the thought did cross my mind that I was glad no one was using the toilet at the time.

 

These pictures don't do the mess justice; I didn't take that many pictures because the floor at the time was pretty gross.

But there was glass in the toilet (that was an easy fix to just flush it down), glass all over the kids backpacks, glass inside of shoes and rain boots and glass that flew so far that it flew out of the laundry room and all the way to the stairs where I almost cut my foot on a piece of glass....there was glass everywhere, I tell ya!

And it was not yet even 8:00 in the morning.

I didn't deal with it. It was too much of a mess and too much glass to try to clean with 5 kids around. I just closed the laundry door and locked it for Dennis to clean up.

Yes, he told me to do that. He is more thorough than I am, and we both know it.

So that was the second day of summer vacation. And yes, it seemed that it was going to be a reeeaaallly long summer.

More to come!

Summerness--The Last Day of School

Finally, school ended for the year on June 6th. The kids had a fun last day of school doing all day fun sports and games which the teachers participated in. One of the games was tug of war--teacher against students. (Teachers won.)

At the end of the day, we picked up the kids and waited in the car line for the last time.  I am not sorry that this is the last time!

When the kids got into the car, we were all surprised to see all the teachers lined up, waving and shouting good-bye as each car drove off with their students. How sweet was that?!

The line of teachers waiting at the end of car line to wave off each and every student. Awww!

"It's my last day of school" smile.

We picked up the kids together as a family, and headed over to Pizza Hut for an early dinner.

So that's what happened at Pizza Hut, and then afterwards we all headed over to the gym for some fun swimming time!

Unfortunately, no cameras are allowed at the pool so there are no pictures. But Henry loved the water! All of the kids were fun to watch but Henry was probably the most entertaining; he is the only baby/toddler that tolerates water being splashed in his face--in fact, he laughs hysterically when people splash him. He also loves to be dunked underwater. He just holds his breath and comes back up smiling.

There is more "summerness" to talk about, but that is how we spent our last day of school. Stay tuned for more!

It is "Country Breeze", not purple!

So we are still working on the bathroom project. It is slow going because we are trying to pay for one thing at a time.

Mom, I am posting this mainly for you because you were curious about how the bathroom is looking. I told you there wasn't much done, and I wasn't kidding! So far, it has been pretty much how the guys left it--drywall up and shower installed, but that's it.

I thought I had a picture to show for the "before" but I guess I don't! So just imagine a gutted out bathroom w/ blue colored drywall, a new shower and that's it. No toilet or sink and only plywood for the floor. 

But we have now painted the walls--Country Breeze! I found it in the "browns"; it's supposed to look kind of tan with just a hint of purple.

Ladder not included!

It is difficult to see the color in this picture, but every time one of the kids walked in to see the paint job, they would say, "Oh! It's purple! I thought you said it was tan?"

I would correct them, "no, it's not purple, it is 'country breeze'."

Then Dennis walked in and said, "Oh. Purple."

It is not purple! It is COUNTRY BREEZE!!

Next will be the floor!

We're going to order the linoleum next week. It will be nice not to feel like we're on Little House on the Prairie.

Funnies and Pictures

Tidbits of news....


This morning, as I was making the kids lunch for school:

Luke: Mommy, I got a present for you in my backpack.
Me: You do?
Luke: Yeah. I'll go get it.
(Rummages through his backpack...)
Luke: Oh wait. It died. Never mind.

Found out later it was just some dandelions--thank goodness!!

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Yesterday as we were driving home from school, I was chewing gum....

Lucy: Mom, what are you chewing? (We don't have gum around here very often for obvious reasons...)
Me: tabacco. (Obviously joking.)
Lucy: No fair! Can I have some?

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Yesterday, the kids were talking about death and what happens when you die, when Luke pipes up out of the blue:

"If we eat the Body of Jesus, we will live forever."

Out of the mouths of babes!! I asked where he learned that, and he looked at me surprised and said, "from the Bible!" I'm still trying to remember when we ever read about that, as we have only been reading the Kids Bible from the Old Testament.


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The other week, Max had a field trip his school was going on and there is an area where the student needs to sign his name to show that he understands that good behavior is expected on the trip.

Max: Why do I have to sign this?
Me: To promise you won't be 'bad'.
Max rolls his eyes but signs the paper. He wrote: "I won't."

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And now for some pictures of Henry and Anna outside! Henry has mastered walking and now walks around outside nearly perfectly with the occasional fall. He doesn't seem to care though, he just gets up and keeps walking until the next fall.

Playing in the sandbox.

Sometimes, if he falls too often, he gives up and starts to crawl. Can't blame him for that!

Love these little chairs! Dennis asked me why I bought these for the kids when they will only be able to fit in them for a little while, and I said, "Because--that is exactly why!" 

He looked confused, but we Mom's get it.

"How's your chair?"

"Not bad. How's yours?"