I shouldn't be Alive

Lately, I've been watching this show called I shouldn't be alive, which tells harrowing, edge-on-your-seat real life stories of people surviving the most unlikely situations. The ones that stand out in my mind are: an athlete  who is training for a marathon falls off the ridge of a trail about 30 feet down, breaks her pelvis, survives 4 days in a remote park which most people don't visit with only her dog, and a small puddle of water. To survive the cold nights which dip to freezing, she does crunches every 5 minutes to keep from getting hypothermia--she does this despite her broken pelvis. On top of this, she drags herself miles down the road to look for help.

Or another one, where a man is the only survivor of a plane crash--he lands in the ocean and stays afloat--on his back--for 3 days, going through valleys of jelly fish.

Or the young couple that get lost in the valley of mountains for 4 days; during their adventure they discover the body of another hiker who never made it out alive. Despite the fact that he was armed with camping gear, along with a compass and a map, doesn't give them much hope that they're going to get out alive either.

Or the teenager who is on a hunting trip with his father, gets separated and attacked by a grizzly bear, kills him with one shot (nearly impossible to do) and survives the night by crawling for help despite his artery in his leg literally hanging out from the huge bear gash.

And yet, they all live to tell about it.

I can only watch one episode a day. Watching these shows always leaves me with so much emotion; sometimes I feel my stomach turning as they go through all this turmoil, and watching them retell these stories while breaking into tears usually has me crying too.

So you're probably wondering why I watch this then, if it seems to bother me so much? I have wondered this too, because these episodes do bother me. The episodes are always the same: there's the trauma, the shock that they survived the trauma, then the hope and determination to be saved, and then the realization of the likelihood that they won't live, and then finally, the resignation of defeat and acceptance of death. By this time, the victim during the interview is usually crying, and I, along with them. But I finally realized what it is that draws me to this show so much: I "get it" what they went through, and if they knew what I went through, they would "get me" too.

Happily, my own heart attack trauma was not a drawn out episode that lasted 3 days. I am thankful that it was only a harrowing 6 minutes. Yet, it was harrowing, it was scary. And it started off the same as these others; the strong will and desire to survive, ending with the realization that you probably won't live, and the acceptance that you will die. You don't want to die, but it's inevitable. You are not strong enough to overcome death.

It's a terrible feeling.

Having to say goodbye without having the words to say them, leaving so much undone, not even knowing how to spend these last minutes of your life, and just using them to beg God for more time. It is the same as drowning, dying of an illness, burning in a house, starving in the wilderness or freezing in a blizzard. All these people (including myself) go through the same denial, the same protests, even though each of their situations are different--every one of them clings for more time.

No joking intended, this is why I can't even flush a spider down the toilet. I can't stand to see them struggle to live, even for those few seconds.

But then, when all seems lost and done, when darkness has won over and you finally have waved your flag of defeat, God steps in. He did this for me, and each one of these survivors.

Not all of the survivors seem to know or admit that it was God who saved them--a lot of them say "by chance, this happened" or "just out of luck, that happened", but it was God, who saved them. It is so obvious. I wonder why they don't see it, or if they just don't want to acknowledge it.

The athlete that crawled on her belly for 4 days wouldn't have made it out if it wasn't for her dog, who led people to find her. They say that when the dog finally returned to her side, he began to drink out of her puddle--her only lifesource--for the first time. She was a little upset with the dog at first, since he had his own puddle and wondered why he would drink out of her own puddle. But it was his way of telling her that everything was okay now, and minutes later, the help arrived.

Or the man that survived by floating on his back for 3 days--even while sleeping? Pretty much impossible! On the 2nd night alone in the ocean, fighting off hypothermia and getting hundreds of jelly fish stings and unable to float any longer, what happens to come floating to him for the first time? A log! A log, out in the vast ocean. He uses this log to stay afloat during the night so he can sleep, and later gets rescued by a fishing boat.

And the young couple that got stranded out in the valley of mountains? The girlfriend had been quietly praying to St.Christopher, patron of travelers, for his help when they later found the dead hiker the next day. In his wallet, they found a prayer card of St.Christopher. Along with this, a box of matches, which had miraculously stayed dry all that time, despite the fact that the hiker had been dead for a year. They use the matches to light a huge fire, and they eventually get found by a search and rescue plane. They credit this hiker for saving their lives; by his notes and his supplies, they had a chance to live, and at the same time, his family finally were able to lay him to rest.

And the teenager who is dying from shock and his artery nearly being severed--he is found (amid a terrible storm) by a doctor who just happened to be camping nearby, and the doctor specializes in shock trauma. He pulls the teenager through the night while they wait for help the next morning. These things don't "just happen". It's all God!

And of course, we know that God miraculously intervened that day for me to live. I shouldn't have lived because Dennis shouldn't have been home that day--he should have been off doing his usual errands that he did every night. And I shouldn't have lived except the cop just happened to pull up the moment I lost consciousness and my heart stopped. I shouldn't have lived, except I had a cop who did CPR right away, and I'm told, 3 burly firemen who took turns doing CPR for 40 minutes. I shouldn't have lived, except one of the firemen was praying Hail Mary's the entire time (according to the notes in my Caring Bridge.)
 "I shouldn't be alive" still hits me every day. Though it's practically been 3 years now, time continues to be precious. I try hard not to waste it. At the same time, once you face death, once you experience it, time has a new meaning. It means that it's ending; not continuing. It means that the hour is almost up, not beginning. It means every second counts, every minute counts. You learn to live like you're dying.

It's not quite my 3rd year anniversary yet, but it doesn't matter, because every day counts. I've said it once and I'll continue to say it until the day I die (again): Time is precious! Don't waste it!

Every time I watch this show, I see how good God is. Even though not all of these people seem to know it, God steps in to save these people; He doesn't allow them to die with no hope. And all of these people who get to live to tell of how they almost died, whether they are spiritual or not, are living examples of the miracles of God.


Here is a psalm that I found fitting: "In their distress they cried to the Lord, who saved them in their peril, Led them forth from darkness and gloom and broke their chains assunder. Let them thank the Lord for such kindness, such wondrous deeds for mere mortals. For He broke down the gates of bronze and snapped the bars of iron." Psalms, 107; 13-16

The Parking Lot Story

Another adventure for the Arganbrights. I don't know how I get so lucky. But don't worry, this time there was no gasoline involved!

Yesterday Luke had a birthday party to go to at the Mall of America. It was his old preschool friends birthday, James. Remember James? Anyway, the party was at the Mall in the Aquarium.

Getting there was no problem. Getting to the right door where the Aquarium was no problem either, because I had been there before and easily walked in with easy parking and no crowds. But this time, it was Sunday, and apparently, everybody shops on Sunday!

First of all, I couldn't find a parking space. That was irritating, but that was the least of my problems. I went up a level and finally found a space way in the back. Getting 5 kids through a super-busy parking lot that acts like a freeway was an issue. I couldn't push the stroller with one hand and hold Anna's hand with the other. I had Lucy push the stroller for me, but it was awkward because she was lagging behind and like I said, this parking lot was busy.

Then we finally got inside the Mall, and it was like a zoo in there. The aquarium entrance was right there inside the doors, but there were crowds of people either sitting around or standing in groups which made it difficult to manuever around. Keeping Lucy with us was hard too, with so many people separating us. To get inside the aquarium, you have to go down a level and there was an escalator right in front of us, but like I said, we had the stroller. Normally Dennis can bring the stroller on the escalator by just tilting it upward on two wheels, but like I said, I had 4 other kids to get on the escalator with me, and they always have trouble getting on the moving stairs. So I went to the ticket booth where there was a big space with nothing around and asked the girl at the counter if I could just leave the stroller there, explaining that I was just dropping off my son at a birthday party and that I would be right back to get it. She used her super-polite voice and said there was a "secret elevator" right around the corridor that's used for only employees that we could use. I had no desire to look for a "secret elevator" because the way things were going, I wouldn't find the "secret elevator" and we were already late as it was, thanks to the crowded parking lot. So I ended up ditching the stroller by the escalators and just hoped that it would still be there when we got back.

Like I said, trying to get all the kids onto the escalator isn't easy when there's a crowd of people already on the escalator. Some of the kids still get a little nervous getting on it, and we almost ended up losing Luke. He did get on safely though, and as I got off, I went up to the girl who was collecting tickets to tell her we were there for a birthday party. She got on her walkie-talkie to get someone to escort us to the birthday room when we were interrupted by Max hollering, "Mama! Help!" I turned around to find him laying on the floor by the escalator. Thinking he was just acting silly, I was about to scold him for laying on the floor where people had to walk over him, but then I realized that his shoe lace was caught in the escalator. I ran up to hit the emergency Stop button, but an employee got there before me and ripped his shoelace out before it sucked his shoe--and his foot--under the stairs. Whew. And I hadn't even dropped Luke off yet.

Then a male employee showed up and told us he would escort us to the party. We went through stairs and many back hallways and I was sure I wasn't going to be able to find my way back. After walking by many other birthday rooms, we finally got to James party. I was ready to drop off Luke but he was very nervous about being left there. He had already been weepy in the car--the big Mall scared him, and all the crowds didn't help. James Mom was trying to comfort him but I didn't feel comfortable leaving him yet. He looked so alone, sitting at the table apart from the other kids, blinking back his tears and trying not to cry. James was at the head of the table and so he wasn't able to sit next to Luke, and Luke didn't know the other kids there. So James's grandma suggested that I stay for a few minutes and help Luke assemble his shark tooth necklace that they gave him and without giving me a chance to say yes or no, she swooped Henry out of my arms so that I could help Luke.  So I basically had no choice.

I was glad I stayed though, because when Luke saw I was going to stay a few minutes longer, I saw him visibly relax and the fear left his eyes. He even began to appreciate his party favor--a boy necklace with a real shark tooth! The dumb thing was impossible to assemble though--you were supposed to wire-wrap the tooth to the necklace and I couldn't get it on. On top of that, Henry, who has not yet showed any stranger-anxiety, decided to show it now at that moment. James's Grandma was holding him and playing with him and he seemed to be doing fine, but he took one look at James' Dad and freaked. From that moment on, nobody could hold him without him screaming, so James's grandma gave him back to me, and I still didn't have the shark tooth wired on yet. Then Anna began to do the potty dance and I knew it was time to go.

A nice lady offered to help with the necklace and I gladly handed it over to her while I tried to distract Henry and sit with Luke. It took about another 10 minutes, but by the time the necklace was assembled and tied it around Luke's neck, Luke was happy and jumped up to play with the shark puppets with other boys, not even saying good-bye. I felt a lot better about leaving, so we waved good-bye and tried to find our way back through all the corridors to the aquarium.

I thought our problems were over once we found our way back to the stairway, but then I realized I left my purse at the party. So we tried to go back to the hallway, but stairway door was locked! Thinking we were locked in the stairway, I began to panic a little. It didn't help that Max asked if were going to be locked in there forever.

I finally did find a door that wasn't locked, thank goodness, and I went up to the same girl to tell her that I left my purse at the party and I needed someone to get it for me since the stair doors were locked without an employee badge. So she radioed the same guy again, and I pleaded him to get it for me so I wouldn't have to take all the kids through all that again. He agreed and left and we waited for about 15 minutes just for him to come back and tell me he couldn't find my purse. So we ended up going with him again, through the stairway and all the hallways, found my purse, waved good-bye again, and this time, the guy escorted us back so we wouldn't get locked in the stairway again.

One bright spot through all of this was that the stroller was still there. Amazing.

As we were walking back to the parking lot though, it occurred to me that I couldn't remember where I had parked. I had memorized the number on the pillar before we left and told myself to remember that we had parked in the "orange level", but with everything that happened, my memory was wiped clean of any parking details. All I could remember was that we were in the orange level--whatever level that was.

I tried looking for one of those maps that has a "You are Here" map on it so it could tell me where the orange level was, but they are doing in construction in some areas of the parking lot, so certain areas were blocked off and I couldn't find any map. I ended up riding the elevator up and down, looking for the orange level, but never found it. Finally, I began to doubt myself and wonder if I really did park in the orange level, so what did we do? We began to stop on each level and we walked the parking lot to the area of where I parked--somewhere in the back. You know what's worse than getting lost in a parking lot? Getting lost in seven of them!

Well, I can't say we walked all seven parking lots, because I knew we didn't park on the top level. That was the only thing I was sure of. I also knew we didn't park on the ground level, because I remembered driving up a level or two to find a parking space. The problem was that I couldn't remember how many levels I drove up.

So I thought that maneuvering 5 children through a busy parking lot was difficult--but maneuvering with 4 kids was just as hard because we were lost. I had Max pushing the stroller, which proved to be a mistake, because he was screaming and panicking with every car that zoomed by us, and there were times when he refused to cross the "street" in the parking lot because he was afraid of getting run over by a car. It didn't help that a bunch of Vikings fans were now zooming all over the parking lots--I only knew that they were Vikings fans because of the yellow and purple clothes and hair. So I had to go back to pushing the stroller with one hand and holding Anna, (who had by now wet herself) with the other hand.

We went through the red parking lot and walked all the way to the back and all the way back to the elevators again....to the blue parking lot and walked all the way to the back and all the way back to the elevators again...to the purple parking lot and walked all the way to the back and all the way back to the elevators again...to the yellow parking lot and all the way to the back of the parking lot. By now, I was sure I had just imagined that I had parked in the orange parking lot and decided that I must have parked in the yellow parking lot. So I refused to go back to the elevators again (remember I have an elevator phobia, people!) and we walked the back of the parking lot, row by row, but never found  the car.

All this time, I was praying to St.Anthony to help us as we were the "lost item". I thought to myself that we never checked out the second level, but I didn't want to go all the way back to the elevators again. I was getting really tired, really stressed, the kids were tired of walking, Lucy was starting to get scared and cry, and Max was screaming every time a car passed us. I was sure that we were somewhere on the yellow level but just couldn't find the car. At one point, I saw a Mall Cop riding through the parking lot on his bike, but he was too far away to call out to and of course I couldn't chase after him with the kids.

So right after saying another prayer to St.Anthony--this time a little more urgently--Max suddenly speaks up and says, "Hey, we're on the Yellow Level. Shouldn't orange come after yellow?" Then Lucy says, "That's right, this parking lot is like the colors of the rainbow!" It suddenly hit me to listen to Max and maybe he was right--maybe orange did come before or after yellow. We just happened to be by a stairwell, and I peeked through the railings at the level below us--and it was the orange level, which happened to be the second level--the one we never checked out! It was as though the angels were singing "Alleluia!" and I could've joined right in.

Well, the only thing I was sure about this time, was that since we were already in the back of the Yellow Parking lot, that we were also parked in the back of the Orange parking lot. So I didn't want to go all the way back to the front of the parking lot just to use the elevator when we were in the right area. So Lucy and Max helped me carry down the stroller two flights of stairs to the Orange Level oh-so-carefully. It took a while, as Lucy teetered every time she took another step, trying to hold on to the stroller and not fall down the stairs.

So on to the Orange Level, we had to look a little bit to find the car, but it didnt' take too long because we were already in the back area of the parking lot. We were never so happy to find the car! I buckled the kids in, promised them a sundae from McDonalds since our plans for making cupcakes were ruined (we ran out of time) and as I started the car, I thought to myself how thankful I was for realizing I had forgotten my purse while I was still in the aquarium rather than finally in the car. Even if it did mean being locked in the stairwell.

By the time we were on the road, it was 5:00, and the party ended at 5:30. That means that we with all that chaos, we were stuck at the Mall of America for an hour and a half!

You might be wondering why I even bothered leaving when the party was going to end in a half-hour. Well, before I left Luke, James mom was nice enough to offer to bring Luke home since they live nearby us, and they had an extra carseat in the car already. Thankfully I had said yes--I could think of no reason to say no, and it meant more time for Luke to spend with James alone. I also had to get back home to get ready for Mass--this was the reason why we had no time to make the cupcakes like I had promised Lucy. And so that was the reason I bought them sundaes instead.

They deserved it, they were troopers throughout the entire fiasco. I can tell you one thing, if I ever throw a birthday party for the kids anywhere--it won't be at the Mall of America!

Seven Quick Takes, conferences, trips and such

Seven Quick Takes

1. 

I haven't done my 7 Quick Takes in a while. So here it goes!

2. 

This week was conference week at school. Long story short, all kids are doing well. Max's teacher seems to really like Max and feels for him more than she lets on. She talked about how the first month was very stressful for him and she could see it in his eyes. She said there were times she wanted to hug him and tell him it would be okay. I initially didn't like this teacher very much at first, because on my first and second meeting with her, she didn't come off as very warm and friendly, but this time she won me over. I guess some people aren't warm and friendly naturally, but that doesn't mean that they don't care. Anyway, she has given him many "outs" that I didn't even know about (for his sake because she could see that certain things were too stressful for him), and Max tells me that she always takes the time to zip up his impossible jacket with the impossible zipper. I don't even take the time to do this--because the zipper is pretty much broken. So all these little things tell me that even though she can't be at Max's side all the time during the day, she is still keeping her eye on him. 

3. 

Lucy is doing well too, but I was surprised when the teacher told me how behind Lucy is. I always thought of Lucy as being "ahead of the game" because of her love of learning. With this school, they have a different system in finding a base-level for the kids; they give the end of the year tests to the kids at the beginning of the year; this way they learn who is "ahead of the game" and needs more of a challenge, and who could use more help with the grade that they're at. So of course with these tests, they don't expect the kids to understand a lot of the stuff since it's a grade higher than where they're at right now. This explains why Max came home those days very upset exclaiming, "Those teachers are giving me tests that I haven't even learned yet!"

Anyway, Lucy is slightly below the other kids but the teacher isn't worried because she sees that Lucy has the interest to learn.

4.

Luke is also doing well (it's Kindergarten, how can you fail that?) but he isn't recognizing a lot of the letter sounds, so the teacher asked permission to put him in a special reading group where they work one-on-one with kids who need it. The other concern is that they say that Luke gets emotional pretty easily at school over little things--over a ripped piece of paper, something that doesn't go right, or if someone hurts his feelings. In other words, Luke is the "sensitive kid"! He doesn't show that side around here at all, though sometimes he does tear up easily. Hopefully it's just a stage because you don't want to think of your kid crying at school. 

5.

Other than conferences, we also took a one day trip to Superior to visit Dennis's mom. She's about a month out from her heart surgery and is doing well. She has a large scar going up to her sternum and is still a little sore. She said she can go back to work in a few weeks. She also had cut her hair short (of which I have to confess, I didn't notice until she pointed it out. But her hair grows so fast it never stays short for long.) She said that it was all the way down to her waist, and on the day of her surgery, she had her sister cut her hair so that it wouldn't be a rat's nest after the surgery. So as they wheeled in the gurney to get her, there they were, cutting her hair. She donated the hair to "Locks for Love", a place where you can donate your hair to make wigs for people who can't afford them. Wasn't that nice? 

The kids did great with the ride up  to and from Superior. I was especially happy with Henry, who hardly fussed at all. And when he fell asleep, the kids were so good about being quiet without me having to shush them at all. 

6. 

The other day, I made a chaplet of St.Philomena with a medal that has the second-class relic of St.Philomena. I posted about it on my other blog, Roses for Mary, and it sold the same day! I was pretty happy about this--this is the reason why I have that blog, to do my advertising. The woman who bought it said she saw it on my blog. It makes me wonder if the other rosaries that have sold were from readers from my other blog; this is the only reason why I want comments on that blog, to get to know my readers, otherwise, I'll never know if my blog is working as advertising or not, unless the person says so.

Jerry, you asked how the "rosary business" is going; well, here's a little more in-depth answer for you: it's going better than last year, and I thought that last year went really well. However, when I looked back over the stats of sales and page views, it actually really didnt' go that well at all.  It didn't bother me at that time because I was thinking of my Etsy more of a hobby than as a business. Now, I think of my Etsy more as a business because it's become my goal to use this as my part-time job and get paid at least part-time wages. I was feeling discouraged this year that my Etsy is still not quite at a part-time wage level, but it's not too far off either. My sales have doubled or even tripled over these past few months. I've definitely learned a lot about what you can do to expose your business and improve your products. I have a lot of new ideas of what I'd like to do with my rosaries, and my hope is that by next year, I will be able to call Etsy my new part-time job!

7.

Speaking of Etsy, do you remember when I asked you what you thought this was?

If you guessed a rainbow octopus, you are wrong, but I can see why you would guess this! It is actually furniture. That's right, furniture! It's sold in Europe in an Etsy business. And yes, this person makes a lot of money! You're supposed to arrange the "strands"in whatever way you want to make a chair, couch, bed or whatever. Weird, but effective.

And last, but not least, here is Max's first essay from school, in his own words:

Toy Store

I love toy store. The toy store is the best store in the universe. I hear people saying I want this and I want that. There are big kids and little kids and medium kids and grown ups. When I eat snacks I think about toy stores. My body feels so excited when I go to the toy stores and I smell toys. I love toys!

The teacher was very proud of this essay. And yes, he does smell the toys.

Ok, I'm going to attempt to make Apple Sin Bread. I will let you know how it goes! Visit Jen at the Conversion Diary!

Pictures and Hot Dog Casserole

A few pictures over the past few weeks...

Dennis celebrated another birthday with his favorite cake--an ice cream cake

Max gave Dennis a latern, Luke gave him a tote, Lucy gave him an orange Halloween skull, and Anna gave him a family picture that we already had. Hey, she wanted to feel included. And I gave him a $25 gift certificate to Von Hanson's.

Some randomness...

It's that time of year again...Hot Chocolate Season...

And to finish off with....

Hot Dog Casserole!

It was...ok. Not great. But I think I didn't add enough salt. And hot dogs.

Ingredients? Ok...'cause I know you're just dying to know, right?

1 pkg of hot dogs
3 cups of sharp cheddar cheese
1 pkg of elbow noodles
1/2 C.of beer
1 chopped onion
(Drink beer.)
Some milk
Some salt.
Some pepper---Hey, it's Rachel Ray's recipe! She eyeballs everything!

Job's bad day verses my bad day

You ever have "one of those day"? Or else there is a period in your life of a series "those" days? The days that test your faith, test your strength? Nothing seems to go your way, you never can get "ahead", everybody is gone or busy when you're at your loneliest?

That's how it's been for me lately. Ever since the heart attack, we've been struggling with money, not able to get ahead. We keep having set-backs. I need a job, or else, my Etsy needs to become my new "real" job. Spiritual dryness has been my new cross in life and that's what I'm talking about with the loneliness. I look for spiritual consolation and find none. I've even asked our parish priest if he would ever consider doing a later morning mass so that I, and many other moms out there who are busy trying to get their kids ready for school in the morning, can go to daily mass again. His answer was that that it might be too big of a change for those who already go to mass. Hmmm...I suppose it is a big change, but it means they can sleep in in the mornings, have a leisurely breakfast, and then still make it to Mass. Sounds like a win-win situation!

Sales have been slow. I have been wondering if I should even keep the Etsy website going...

But wait! This post isn't a feel-sorry-for-me post. There is a moral to the story. :-) (You know how I like to tie those in..)


A few days before things peaked to their very worst, I had just finished praying for some help in all the areas I've mentioned, and especially help with money. Then I opened the bible and the first thing I see is the first book of Job. I don't normally read from the Old Testament, because I don't really understand it. But my eyes fell on the title: "Job's Wealth and Piety". Ooh! This sounded like a story I could use!

So I won't copy down the entire story, as it's too long. Mostly I will paraphrase, but I'll copy down a few chapters that I feel are important:

The story starts out saying how Job is an upright man, very holy and faithful to God. He's very wealthy, his family is large and healthy, and to thank God for his gifts, Job would often give feasts and invite his entire family to the feast, and then end the feast by sacrificing and animal. He did this on a regular basis, and God was pleased with his faithfulness.

Then one day, God sees Satan roaming about the world and patrolling it and God says to him, "Have you noticed my servant Job, and that there is no one on the earth like him, blameless and upright, fearing God and avoiding evil?"

And Satan says, "Have you not surrounded him and his family and all that he has with your protection? You have blessed the work of his hands, and his livestock are spread over the land. But now put forth your hand and touch anything that he has,  and surely he will blaspheme you to your face." And the Lord says to Satan,"Behold, all that he has is in your power; only do not lay a hand upon his person." (Job 1, 7-12)

So then all these bad things started happening to Job. All of his oxen were slaughtered by enemies, lightening struck his sheep and the shepherds decided to just eat them, the camels he had were stolen and killed, his children were carried off in a desert storm and killed, and his house was demolished. So Job tore at his clothing and cast himself prostrate on the ground and cried out, "Naked I came forth from my mother's womb; and naked shall I go back again. The Lord gave and the lord has taken away; blessed be the Name of the Lord!" (Job 1, 21-22)

So then God again speaks to Satan and points out that among the trials Job went through, he still did not blaspheme against God or lose his faith. And Satan says, "Skin for skin! All that a man has will he give for his life. But now put forth your hand and touch his bone and flesh, and surely he will blaspheme you to your face." And the Lord said to Satan, "He is in your power, only spare his life." (Job 2, 3-7)

So then poor Job goes through a great peril of suffering. God allows Job to be covered in severe boils from his head to his feet. He takes a potsherd and tries to scrape the boils off, which surely causes even more suffering. He then sits among the ashes of his home. And his very unwise wife says, "Are you still holding to your innocence? Curse God and die." And Job responds, "Are even you going to speak as senseless women do? We accept good things from God; and should we not accept evil?"

Through this, Job said nothing sinful. (Job 2, 9-11)

So this is what I came away with. Things have been hard, but Job had it much, much, worse.

I also came away with this: God treats His servants harshly; the more He gives you, the more He will ask of you. The more you ask to be more like Him, the more He will put you on the cross. The more you desire holiness, the more faults and weaknesses you will see of yourself. But if He does all this to you, it must be because He trusts you. If you suffer a lot, then it must be because He counts you as one of His friends.

There's always a temptation to doubt God, especially when our comfortable life suddenly takes a turn for the worse: a job is lost, or our health is suddenly gone and so on. But as Job says, "The Lord gives and the Lord can take away, blessed be the Name of the Lord." Anything that comes and goes in our lives happens for a reason; God gives what's good for us and takes away what we don't need; this life isn't about comfort, this life is a test of faith and in Heaven, we'll finally have our comfort!

Another "Kids say the darndest things" moment

We're still a little short on money around here. The car experiment seems to be working; we're not spending as much on gas anymore, but now we're in recovery mode. Dennis and I were expecting some checks on Saturday but they didn't come, so we figured it would come today. We both have our reasons for needing this money...for Dennis it's for paying bills and for me, it's to get something for Dennis's birthday, which is today.

But then we remembered that its' Columbus Day today and that the mail wouldn't be coming again. As I was making the school lunches, I realized that I barely had enough food to cover for their lunches, plus for the kids afternoon snack at school. But this meant I had nothing to give them when they got home from school and that we had nothing for dinner either. We also had no toilet paper, and that's an emergency, people! So all of these little realizations were starting to pile up on me and I began to rant a little about no money, no food, and no mail, thanks to Mr.Columbus who messed it all up by discovering that the world is round. And Lucy was listening to me and said forlornly, "We have no food? That means we're poor." Then she sighed and said, "I guess that means we'll have to eat paper."

Fun in the leaves costs us nothing but fun!

 She said it so seriously that it took me by surprise and made me laugh. I assured her we would not have to eat paper to live on, but she said cheerfully, "I eat paper all the time! I chew it up, and swallow it. Paper is good!"

Lucy has been complaining of stomach aches lately. I think we now know why.

As far as money goes, we are not so bad off that we will need to eat paper. We're definitely feeling the pinch, and I sometimes feel frustrated that i can't help more with money. We've talked about me getting a job, but there's nothing out there that doesn't require you to work on weekends, and we have no one to watch the kids. I keep hoping that my rosary business will take off and that I can count that as a part-time job, but sales have been slow. If only had a bright idea like this entrepreneur:

Do you know what this is? I'm not going to tell you, I'm going to let you guess. I will just tell you this: the weirder you guess, the closer you are to being right. It's weird, I tell ya. Weird! And yet this woman is selling them!

As for Dennis's birthday, we already made plans to celebrate it on Wednesday, so it still works out. Lucy has been having some strange ideas lately, it must be all that paper she's eating. She wants to buy him a monster for his birthday. Happy birthday to you....

Ok, off to clean the house and all that fun stuff!

Joliet Vocation Story

I found this off a blog, I thought it was fun to watch, you might too! Sorry, you'll have to click over to the blog to watch this!

What we've been doing around here...

I don't really do my Quick Takes like I used to, because news doesn't pile up like it did before. But here are a few new things that have been going on around here...


Last week, I had four cavities in my mouth filled. Yes, four! I'm so ashamed, LOL. Even worse, that was only on one side of my mouth; I still have two more on the other side that need to be filled. So that's six cavities, the most I've ever had in my life. That's what I get for skipping brushing my teeth those nights when I was so tired I just went straight to bed...

We got a third car. You must think we're really rich. Ha! So opposite! :-) Bringing the kids to school has kind of been sinking us financially; we've been filling up either the van or Dennis's truck every day, which means we're spending about $100 a week just on gas. The next option was to put the kids on the bus, but for many, many reason which I won't go into, Dennis decided to get a third car instead--a small, fuel-efficient car that we will use for all of our little outings, and bringing the kids to and from school. It's only been two days, but so far Dennis's plan is working well; we've only filled up the car once when normally we would have filled it up twice--and we still have 1/2 a tank left which will be enough for hopefully one more day of bringing kids to and from school.

Ok, there's more to tell, but it's so distracting here with the kids yelling and playing, I never can tell what is play or fighting...

More later!