Fish Awards

Yay! Today was Max and Luke Fish Award Ceremony; a ceremony held a few times a year to recognize students personal achievements during the school year. It is also their "Pep Fest"--you remember those, don't you?

The families of the students receiving awards were invited to attend, and unlike so many schools, this school does not give an award to everyone! That's right, you gotta earn it baby!

I do feel kind of sorry for the other students who work hard to be recognized and don't receive an award. Lucy is one of those students, an over-achiever, really. She works really hard in school, is basically a good kid and tries hard to be friendly to others. We told her that we see her efforts though, even if she isn't officially recognized for it by the school. It sounded better in my head than how it came out.

Anyway, Max's award was for personal achievement: last year he was very quiet, did not speak to anyone, volunteer for anything, was not a "book buddy" (the older kids team up with the Kindergarteners and read them books). But this year, he volunteered in front of his class to demonstrate how to use the calender and he was a book buddy to a little boy and read him a book! His teachers were so proud of him they wanted to give him a Fish Award to encourage him to keep it up.

We were very proud of him and cheered from we sat.

Luke received an award too, though his picture didn't turn out at all. I'm not even going to bother posting it, that's how bad it is.

His Fish Award was for standing up for himself for the first time. He finally had "enough" of being pushed around by the girls and told a little girl (who had told him that she didnt' like him): "That's mean, and it hurts my feelings when you say that." She looked surprised and said, "Oh, I'm sorry! I didn't know--I won't do it again."

The teacher overheard and was so proud of how he handled the situation, plus he taught this little girl something about others feelings that her teachers had been trying to teach her for a long time! Believe me, knowing Luke, this took him a lot of self-control to talk to her like that!

Since I don't have a picture for Luke, here is a video of him receiving his award. (You will have to go to the actual blog to see it.)



And here is Max receiving his award:

Great Accomplishments for a 6 year old!

I have a happier post on Luke today, and I've been meaning to update for a while, but you know how it is!

After venting my feelings in my post about Luke, I contacted his teacher and special ed teacher. (Actually I think I contacted her before.) Both were very willing to help and sympathetic. His special ed teacher told me that they're working with Luke on social skills and his teacher said she would ask Luke if there was anyone he wanted to sit next to in class the next day. So after he arrived at school, the teacher asked him who he would like to sit next to and Luke replied with his usual, "I don't know" (a frustrating answer for those who are trying to help him!) and he finally chose a boy named Alex, who didn't really know at the time.

After writing my last blog post I went to Adoration and prayed that Luke would find a friend, as I know all of you have done. I offered a rosary that he would have a friend that day and when the kids got home I asked them all as I always do how their day went. Everyone said, "Ok" but Luke said, "It went GREAT!!!" I have never had a response like this from Luke before! I asked why it was such a great day and he said that a little boy named Alex went up to him at recess and asked if they could be friends and offered to teach Luke some sport skills so that he could join in more. Where did this kid from and where has he been hiding?!? He has been an angel in disguise for Luke. I was and am so grateful for this little boy. Ashley (the special ed teacher) said that Alex is a good little boy who has been a great example for many kids--sticks up for the kids who aren't liked.

Later in the week, the class read a book about best friends and the teacher had them do a little exercise on who their best friends were. Luke talked about James, a little boy from his preschool who he has not seen in about a year but I know he misses him very much. This is what he wrote (with help from his para):

I found this while looking through Luke's backpack or I never would have known that he was missing James so much. I took pictures along with an email to James mom asking if we could arrange for a playdate. She was so moved by this that she asked if they could have Luke over for dinner this week!

 One of the best things is that the day the class did the "best friends exercise", Luke told me that Alex put Luke down as his best friend! Wow! And it doesn't stop there!

The other great thing that happened is that Luke is up for a "FISH Award"! A Fish Award are for students who are recognized for going "above and beyond" in some way--it could be in school work, helping others or accomplishing a goal. Luke's award is for standing up for himself for the first time the other day: a little girl who DAILY tells Luke that she doesn't like him again told him, "I don't like you." Usually Luke just slunks away when she says this, but that day he said to her: "That's mean. It hurts my feelings when you say that." A the little girl (who I found out has some problems of her own and doesn't mean to intentionally hurt others), looked surprised and said, "Oh, I'm sorry! I won't do that anymore." His teacher overheard this and praised Luke for standing up for himself and teaching the little girl about how words can hurt others, and so he's up for a Fish Award! (Max is also up for a Fish Award for something different that I'll have to talk about in a seperate post.)

So hopefully things are now only get better; it's definitely been an answer to prayer!

Mr.Luke

I need prayers for "Mr. Luke", as I call him. He's hurting deep inside at school. He told me the other day that he has no friends, that no one likes him at school, that no one talks to him in class. When he told me this, he got a little choked up though he was trying hard not to cry, and my heart broke right in half.

This is the same problem as last year; no one liked him, he had no friends. If kids talked to him at all, it would be to insult him. One little girl would tell him every day that she didn't like him. He tried to ignore it and to his credit, wouldn't say anything back to her, but it got to him after a while. Pretty soon he was faking illnesses so he wouldn't have to go to school. He was thrilled when he got sick for real and got pneumonia.

I was hoping it would be different this year, but a lot of the kids in his class are from his Kindergarten class, so they already have an opinion about him. I had to drop him off late one day because of his therapy, and as I was leaving, I saw him outside at recess. He was by himself playing, while everyone just played around him. I waited and watched for a few minutes to see if he would approach some kids but he never did. I asked him later why he doesn't try to play with the other kids and he said because they say "no" when he tries.

Over the summer, he got an official diagnosis of ADHD and PPD (a diagnosis meaning that there are many symptoms of autism but not enough to call it autism). In the report, it was said that Luke didn't appear to be "able" to carry on a conversation--meaning that he was unable to meet eye contact, and that he would act inappropriate, say inappropriate things, get into someone's personal space, get too touchy-feely or be too silly. This is how it is for him with basically everyone, and many of these behaviors are "cover-ups" because he doesn't know what to do. A lot of this will get better as he matures but he also will be getting social skills in school to help him know how to cope so he can make friends.

So I ask as Luke's family, to please say a prayer for him that he will make at least one friend at school. It's very hard for me to send him to school knowing that he will be lonely and insulted.

To end on a bright note, I had the inspiration to put Luke into boys gymnastics. He needs something to boost his self-esteem up and I think (because he's pretty strong for his age) that he could be good at it. At first he was skeptical and said seriously (when I brought it up to him), "I think it's too dangerous. But thanks anyway, Mom."  But then I showed him the videos I took of Lucy at her first class and how they teach one-on-one, and start everything very small and low to the ground and he began to warm up to the idea. (It also helped to see all the trampolines and the foam pit!)

It's too late to sign him up now (and besides, we're broke) but I'm going to save up and get him enrolled in the winter. I really hope that 6 months from now I will be able to tell a different story about Luke and how he's doing!

Thanks in advance for the prayers. ;-)

It's been a long time....

It's been a long time since I've updated, and although there has been much to tell, there hasn't been much time to talk. Or blog.

Over the summer, we've gone camping...highlights of one of the camping trips is that one of my children-on-the-dock-fears came true--Luke fell off the dock and into the water. Luckily, it was in the shallow end, but still. He was pretty upset about it. Yes, I took a picture anyway.

This was taken just before Luke fell in.

Dripping wet, but lesson learned.

That was in June. In July, we celebrated Luke's 6th birthday.

We also celebrated America's birthday....

Lucy and Anna got their crazy 4th of July hair done again.

It was also the first year we let the kids do sparklers. Rather scary!

We went to visit Minnesota's largest candy store...it had a lot, but I wouldn't say it was a huge place.

And that was it! We had one more camping trip, and some visi